Never did I imaging making myself sick until I did this every day and people laughed at me.

I was 13 or 14 years old when I first watched the movie “When Friendship Kills” like the girls in the film who made themselves sick I too was body-conscious having been called fat from an early age.

The girls in the film ate usually and made themselves sick and successfully lost a lot of weight.

I wanted to be like them. Slim and almost perfect, only they were too thin, and one of the girls in the film ended up dead due to a lack of food and alcohol.

I never saw this, and sometimes I still don’t see this.

I tried starving myself and ended up almost passing out.

It made me feel weak and a failure because I couldn’t handle going without a few calories.

When I went to school, I started starving myself and making myself sick.

This became regular until people began to notice. You wouldn’t believe the reaction I received; I told them I wasn’t feeling well, and this would continue every day.

A teacher questions me, and of course, I was good at blagging, so I told them it wasn’t happening and that I was okay.

People who I thought were my friends started laughing and making sick noises until I broke down and confessed.

My friends even came to my house once and watched me throw away my dinner and were almost in tears. I just told them that I wasn’t hungry, and I was full up.

The only thing that made me stop was when I threw up blood, and I got scared. I was all alone starving myself and making myself sick, with no one to talk to because people thought it was funny.

Today, I still hate my body and the way I look, and maybe the bad things that have happened to me are funny and all my fault.

My perception of the perfect body is still those girls who are too thin in other people’s eyes.

I no longer make myself sick, but occasionally starve myself and restrict myself to a certain number of calories per day.

Maybe I will never fully recover, but I will always hear them making sick noises and laughing at me.

It’s taken me years to write this post about making myself sick.

One of the reasons why I have finally gained the courage to write about this, let alone hit publish is because of a friend who has encouraged me to be myself.

Please note that this is a real-life story and that names and places have been changed to protect identities.